Lately I am thinking a lot of all my IF-Sisters!! I have been one for so looooooong and there was days I was thinking I am going to be a IFFER for ever. You know ,like at the end I am going to get a “life-long-infertile-badge”
I know how every time we were not doing treatments ( it was the time when we was busy getting the strength to tackle the bull by his horns to do it AGAIN…, or the time busy rocking or savings-piggy for money, and NO it was not for ice cream, it was for nice stuff like hormones.MMMmmmmmm
…and that I can tell you every single time I was just thinking, can’t I just be pregnant, just to get there was huge for me, because then I can take it day by day. And the minute I was pregnant I BELIEVE WITH EVERY SINGLE THING IN ME…THIS IS GOING TO BE IT!!! Just so that my heart could be broken into 1000000000000000000000000000000000 of pieces with a miscarriage.
And year after year you just keep on wishing, keep on praying, keep on hoping!!!
I always think… I will only know it will be the end if I saw a baby, then I will know it’s for real!! I am still believing that second when I see them, I will know this will be the end!!
Because I am still not off the hook yet . I still feel like an semi-IFfer…
And I know how there are so many girls out there that wishes with their whole heart to be lucky with a baby. Girls that feel they have been forgotten. Girls that feel they will never get lucky!! I know how it feels to be left behind year after year after year. Listening to the every “24 sec-next-pregnancy-announcement” of your friends , to the “how-difficult-it-is-to-have-kids” comments.So to all the girls with a baby wish in your heart, my wish for each and every one of you lovely girls out there, I know how hard it is for you…….. I HOPE YOUR NEXT TIME WILL BE YOUR LUCKY ONE!!