8 Months.....and it seems like if their sleeping better... jippee!!!

I will not be at my computer for a while... but see you soon.

xxxxxx

The twins are 8 months. My throat are feeling funny , just by the idea of them getting so big, before I see ...they will be having their 1^st. I am enjoying them so much and before I can enjoy a stage they have move on....where is the first 3 months where I could just sit and look at them????

They doing so good and we are so happy with their progress.  They are eating more and more different foods, and Nika wants to hold her bottle all by herself (its a mess) Wium is putting every single thing in his mouth....he love shoes.... geee its giving me the creeps. They love the pram-rides daily and to be outside.

They not shy to go to other people. They are very social. Nika love giving hugs.... and Wium think everyone he meets is a clown.

When Luv is getting home after work, they go mad. He will then take them with him upstairs, and while getting out of his working clothes, he sing and entertain them. It gives me a quick break just to get everything in order. All you can hear then is ...giggles and laughs. And its nice boding time with daddy. Luv are doing so much effort with them ... he is a wonderful DAD.

Night time.....they normal babies...they don’t sleep.....there are just so much they can maybe miss out in life.

Twins meeting up with a friend, she was born a week before them. I think Nika admire her hair!!

Sometimes I look at the twins ...and think how do you get them big?? Because everyday more and more happen!.

Wium still love every single thing you give him to eat, its just super. Nika on the other hand will like it  today , and tomorrow she hates it. She don’t like to eat. I will cook the nicest stuff and she will think...in her life...it was the worst thing she ever tastes. I am not doing the buffet thing for her so if she don’t like it , stay without it.  Its getting better, because if she see her little brother is eating, then she wants too.

Worst of eating is when their months are full  of food , they love to put their feet with the socks in it, its such a mess!! One part I don’t like...the eating part.

I am more strict with them at night time now, and its playing off. There was a time when they totally ruled us!

They love playing with all their toys and each other, they laugh at each other and yes they do have their fights, kicking and clapping each other ending up with tears. And to see their conversations are so cute to watch.

Their teeth are giving them a hard time....but the only thing you see is ...shining gums!!! And burning bums!!.

They are rolling all over the place and going around, like clocks. They get where they want too. Nika can sit for a long time playing....Wium don’t like to sit, he wants to MOVE... he love wires and plugs.

So this weekend he get on to his knees and arms and move forward, I was so shock ! the next step is crawling....he is a little mover, watch out.

They getting so big now, before I can enjoy the stage they are moving on like spoodnicks

I am doing okay, have a small bit of discomfort, but as I know everything will get back to normal at the end.

2 weeks ago when I was discharge from hospital the Dr ask if I will be okay...Yes , I am always okay!! Yes , but emotionally ??  .....yes , I will be. Its not the end I wanted for myself, but who can predict anyway? How their life needs to turn out.

What did I wanted my life to be 12 years ago ....

I wanted kids with all of my heart

I wanted to start a family immediately

I wanted to have 5 kids ( Luv wanted 4)

I wanted a life with NO hick-ups.. I wanted an easy ride.  Now this sound O, so boring...

I have had clients who did IVF when I was not even married and from their stories, I wish this will never happen to me ever.

While I start Ivf-ing years ago, One of my clients was doing Suro- I was thinking please I don’t ever want to  end up, to that extreme.

Ectopic’s...that sound to sore, please skip me that.

All through these years, what kept me going was.. was believing NEXT time your luck will  change and with all these believing I did not realize how time fly, never ever did I think my path will be so difficult ... this is how my IF –CV look.

8 IUI   #          1 GIFT                        # 6 IVF           # 3 time Surrogating         # 2 Ectopic’s

In 11 years I was 10 x pregnant and I have loose them all, sometimes it was more tragic than others.  I was in theatres more times than I was in the movies, I can look back and know I have tried it all,  although I never have had the privilege to be pregnant too the end or give birth to a baby ( it was one of my biggest wishes but life is not always the way we want it),  thanx a 10 00000000000  times I have had a sister who give me the best prezzie ever... Nika and Wium.

My heart is sore because of as my babies pass each stage its the last and the cute outfits, I wanted to keep for” a-may-be-baby”  can go the someone else thats in need now. I ended my TTC journey with a BANG!! Like one of my friends say, that’s how you do everything, its not a surprise.

I am just glad I came out stronger on the other side, I am full of scars physically and emotionally, but I have made it. Now I can see forward to a normal family life, at last.

My 2 loveable babies xxxxx

 At last my first MOTHER’S DAY!! Thought I never ever writes this.

I do think the media makes allot WhoHA about it, but that’s just my thoughts.

I remember sitting in church on mother’s day, its dreadful, painful and just plain terrible. The minister always loves to make a BIG THING about mother’s day. Handing out a chocolate or some gift to” ALL THE MOMMIES”. ( what makes you a mommy ? only when you bare you own kids? What if you are a mom to many kids at an orphanage? Or even a mom to an animal?)

 Then you that actually wants to be one so much don’t get a thing....because you don’t have kids. It feels as if there is a spotlight on you...your in component women  And each and every year is just the same “ snot” the one minister that did not do it was the one that married us, he will give out things to all the women!! You diverse a medal.

...because, what about the so many women out there, that for some medical reason, some personal reason, some emotional reason, some secret reason cannot be a mommy ??

SO today to all the moms and “specially” all the to-be-some-time-a-mommy-hopefully-soon and all the women with a prayer in their heart... I love you xxxx

Granny-Au-Pair on duty, do you think she is coping???

This whole week I was lying low!! Did not do much, could not do much. But today I am feeling good, no more constantly pain, and discomfort, wounds look good and healed!

I did have a “Granny- Au-pair” for the twins. They just LOVE her!! She could not turn her back for n sec then they scream!! They were sitting with her the whole time, and mommy could take naps!! It was wonderful....thanx MOM!!

The Granny-Au-pair just left, I could see the she will not last long( never get a OLD au-pair) , Nika is fine , but Wium ( wiggly-worm) is not everyone’s playmate. He is just always on a roll. He don’t want to sit still for a sec! The Au-pair was so glad when the twins hit their cots at night.

It was every nice with my mother here, and the twins already missing their ”ouma”