When you in it, there’s so many times you think, will this ever end?? Or when will you have a glimpse of the so called life you know,  will it ever show on the horizon again??

I remember the so many nights when you got like zero sleep! The most times up for a night was 21 times! And then the many times you watch the clock and it’s 4 o’clock and all you think is can this day just start cause the night was chaos.

Will it ever happen that kids sleep through?? Or is it just a saying?

...and then when and how you don’t know or remember... but the kids sleep from you put them in bed till 7 in the morning! You can’t believe your luck!! The first few night you sit and wait for when they will wake cause this just can’t be true!!! And then before you know you so used to this new sleep-through-nights!!!

You remember the nights when you need to do feeds every 3 hours running around to make bottle’s, change diapers, getting burps out. Before you hit the bed you have already made the arsenal of bottles and putting everything ready for you nightly=duty=forever=calls. This change into your new life! It’s all you knew!...

And then one day you so fed up and decided this is the end no bottles anymore!!! This decisions took you more than a year to do, and then ... your kids is just fine!! And you wonder why the hell did you not do this a year ago!!!!!!

I have change most days 14 diapers! It was  some days all I did the whole day( especially with the teeth) you wonder will you ever get them off their diapers??? How will they ever get potty train?? Or will they go to their matric farewell with a bag with not lipstick but diapers?? And then before you know it, they potty train and don’t have a diaper on day and they sleep without them too. And you think how the hell did I do this???

And now my kids are grown up and I can not carry them like always, this bring me to tears.

They nearly 4, and my house still have prem clothes in, all 12 of their bottles are still standing on the same place. Their dummy’s are on the same place as when they was baby( they only dummy till one year, so for 3 years the dummy’s are on the same spot, cause I wish they want them still!) ridiculous I know.

And I still got packs of diapers cause I did not think we will ever get to the panty and undie-stage! Many friends want to buy the packs, and I say let me just first have a look how many there are( I know how many there are)

Why can I just not let go!! Of this baby stage??? Maybe cause I just love every single bit of it??

I was addicted to it!                                            

And yesterday night when I feel so funny?? I wonder maybe I am pregnant???? Can not think this thought cross my mind... with tubes gone and a loop in... I still think I can get pregnant!!

When you in it, there’s so many times you think, will this ever end?? Or when will you have a glimpse of the so called life you know,  will it ever show on the horizon again??

I remember the so many nights when you got like zero sleep! The most times up for a night was 21 times! And then the many times you watch the clock and it’s 4 o’clock and all you think is can this day just start cause the night was chaos.

Will it ever happen that kids sleep through?? Or is it just a saying?

...and then when and how you don’t know or remember... but the kids sleep from you put them in bed till 7 in the morning! You can’t believe your luck!! The first few night you sit and wait for when they will wake cause this just can’t be true!!! And then before you know you so used to this new sleep-through-nights!!!

You remember the nights when you need to do feeds every 3 hours running around to make bottle’s, change diapers, getting burps out. Before you hit the bed you have already made the arsenal of bottles and putting everything ready for you nightly=duty=forever=calls. This change into your new life! It’s all you knew!...

And then one day you so fed up and decided this is the end no bottles anymore!!! This decisions took you more than a year to do, and then ... your kids is just fine!! And you wonder why the hell did you not do this a year ago!!!!!!

I have change most days 14 diapers! It was  some days all I did the whole day( especially with the teeth) you wonder will you ever get them off their diapers??? How will they ever get potty train?? Or will they go to their matric farewell with a bag with not lipstick but diapers?? And then before you know it, they potty train and don’t have a diaper on day and they sleep without them too. And you think how the hell did I do this???

And now my kids are grown up and I can not carry them like always, this bring me to tears.

They nearly 4, and my house still have prem clothes in, all 12 of their bottles are still standing on the same place. Their dummy’s are on the same place as when they was baby( they only dummy till one year, so for 3 years the dummy’s are on the same spot, cause I wish they want them still!) ridiculous I know.

And I still got packs of diapers cause I did not think we will ever get to the panty and undie-stage! Many friends want to buy the packs, and I say let me just first have a look how many there are( I know how many there are)

Why can I just not let go!! Of this baby stage??? Maybe cause I just love every single bit of it??

I was addicted to it!                                            

And yesterday night when I feel so funny?? I wonder maybe I am pregnant???? Can not think this thought cross my mind... with tubes gone and a loop in... I still think I can get pregnant!!

Nearly 3 times a week my kids want face paint in their faces! and every time they choose a new theme which mommy must paint. This time they wanted to be rabbits. and they going to town or friends everyone that laid eye on  them wanted to know, have you been to a party?? No, Its there normal day faces fantasies

Nika love it to get her nails done, like every single second day!! high maintance ! Wium get his cuticles done by dad, metro-boy

 

. Barrel of love!!!

Having fun on the weekend! Look how the "big kids" in the back are enjoying the train ride!

if you think you VIP, let someone do the rowing!

the Kids are back in their "NEW" room which they love.....

Preparations is a on going business!

The before looks so pale now!!

The masking tape was on the wall for weeks!

This is the reason it took so long!!! cause mommy we can paint!

 

I did to redo some cause, its boring to keep between the lines!

.... at last the finish!!!

did not think it will ever happen

This project made me feel more than just mommy

I still can do other stuff too

 

I love this new room!!!!!!!

I know you must think I have left..... I think I just could not found my laptop in my house. Because I can not found anything....because I start redoing this kids room which I thought will take me on the most 2 days but at this pace it fell like 2 weeks!

Geee I quickly move the kids out of their room for the night so that I can paint their room. Now they have beds on the floor, with a weeks washing surrounding them, curtains ( that have been wash) hanging over al the cupboards. Dirty clothes in baskets that we trip over all the time. My room with half their room's stuff in.... and and and.

This is the reason for my  absence.... but hopefully tomorrow they can move back till the last touches need to be done. otherwise I will go insane!!!! its a mess in my house and I create this monster!!

you will see the new room soon.....

Must feel as if I got missing, I think I did gone missing. Time fly and if I see, another week have just passing by.

After 10 years I am in this need to redo.... re-paint... re-decorate... re-everything in my home!

First on this list are the twins room. So I  masking-tape the whole room........ Weeks ago.....and still the room have not seen a dash of paint!!!

Cause of the not get to paint, I try I small strip of paint in my room and end up re-painting my room, repaint all the furniture in the room and all of this happen at cut-throat-speed due to 2 little people that also want to paint, what a mess and the moment I move anything in the room, they think it’s a brand new hurdle-route!!

But I chew my gums through, not to flip and end up with a new room, a project tick off and still the kids room with just the masking tape all over the place!!!!!! And NO the theme are not masking tape!!!

 

And now its all this long weekends in which I think I must RELAX!!!! Cause I need it!!!

can mommy take a photo of you??? and this is the pose I got!!!

 

Nice bunny-eggs!!

 

When you order your fertility drugs, it arrive in “the Purple Bag” !!

 

I still remember when “the bag” arrive it was like this bad-surprise-packet to see what your plan will be for your next IVF attempt.

I can still remember how I look at this bag and think how the hell am I going to get all this injection into me??? Will I make it?? I wish this was not for me!!

.. and then after a few try’s I have a few “purple bags”! so I just kick this bad memory bag to the back of my cupboard.

Mr W just love going to the squash courts with his dad! But he wanted a sports bag like his dad! And I knew that if I give him a bag I cannot take it back, and at this stage I don’t have any spare bags. And he wanted one.

 

So whoola I remember the “purple bag”!! or must  I say vanity-thing. And give it to him! He was ecstatic about it..... mommy my own bag!

In his bag is xtra T shirt for after playing ( he don’t even sweat!) all the broken balls, his modified broken racket, keys( which don’t open the squash courts) and a sweatbands, and drinks for afterwards, it’s very funny! I just laugh when the bag is on his shoulder!!

... after all the “purple bags” was the very beginning of Mr. W!!!!

 

Mommy can’t wait for your first real game!!!!